Step 1: Make sure you have a case before you file a lawsuit.

The Chronicle of Higher Education reports:
"The University of Notre Dame, defending itself in a lawsuit over its decision to fire a tenured engineering professor, Oliver M. Collins, has asserted in court documents that Mr. Collins used more than $190,000 in research grant money and university resources to buy unauthorized equipment, including digital cameras he used to take pornographic pictures."

A commenter on the Chronicle's blog summed it up nicely:
"If you're going to sue your employer for wrongful termination you need to be aware that the employer's defense will become public information. What was this guy thinking?"

College president decides to make lemonade out of lemons....make that diet lemonade

When a skinny alumna told Stephens College president Dianne Lynch to lose some weight, the president decided not to get offended. Instead, she took the opportunity to earn some money for her college. Lynch told the alumna that she and her staff would lose weight in exchange for a donation to the university. So they made a bargain. If the 200 employees lose a total of 250 pounds by January 1, the college will receive a $1 million dollar donation. In addition, if Lynch loses 25 pounds, the kitty goes up to $1.1 million. The gutsy alumna is remaining anonymous. So, how overweight is this college president? Here's a picture:

She looks pretty good to me. I wish I looked that good...

Fidel Castro uses the Beloit College Mind List as Evidence that America is Evil

Fidel Castro has a blog.  (That's strange enough for an entry here, but it gets better.)

Castro cites a "study published by Beloit College" as evidence that U.S. and British intelligence agencies have been distorting American children's minds via drugs and propaganda. He bemoans, "It is terrible to think that the intelligence and the feelings of children and youth in the United States could be mutilated in such a way."

Fidel was reading the Beloit College Mindset List, recently featured here. The Mindset List is an annual ritual that gives us a peak into the minds of college freshmen, mostly for the sake of making their professors feel old. For example, this year's college freshmen were born after Czechoslovakia split into the Czech Republic and Slovakia. So the Mindset List says that, for these freshmen, Czechoslovakia never existed.

Fidel (mis)quotes these horrifying facts about American college students from the Mindset List:

• "They believe Czechoslovakia never existed."
• "They believe Beethoven is a dog they saw in a film."
• 
  
  "They think Michael Angelo is a computer virus."
• 
  
  "They think that American companies have always done business in Vietnam."
• 
  
  "They think that Korean cars have always been running in their country."
• 
  
  "They believe that the United States, Canada and Mexico have always been linked to each other by a Free Trade Agreement."

Clearly, this is evidence of a U.S. plot to start a nuclear war. Fidel concludes, "I was stunned to realize to what extent education could be distorted and prostituted in a country with more than 8,000 nuclear weapons and the most powerful means of war in the whole world. To think that there are still people in their right mind capable of believing that my warnings are exaggerated!"

Actual ads on Craig's List

Trampoline for sale - $40
"Kind of rusty and missing a couples of springs, excellent condition."

1966 Lincoln Continental - $3500
"This car is in really good condition... There is a rust issue on the roof... The back window is missing, It was broken when the rust on the back window was being cleaned up... Interior is great...The front passenger seat is in need of repair...The car isn't starting at the moment... The trunk is full of spare parts." Actual image in Craig's list ad:

Bond girl science

Once again, our daring scientists are tackling important problems, like curing cancer, stopping global warming, and studying James Bond films. Some of the latest important findings include these facts about the female characters in James Bond films:

• 88 percent of "major female characters" engaged in some form of sexual activity with James Bond.
• 1 percent attempted to kill Bond before engaging in sexual activity.
• 1 percent attempted to kill Bond during sexual activity.
• 0.5 percent attempted to kill Bond after sexual activity.
• 25 percent were targeted by a weapon.
• 5.6 percent were presumed dead at the end of the film.
• 12.3 percent were definitely dead.
• 55.9 percent were "good" throughout the film.
• 14.4 percent were "bad" throughout the film.
• 8.7 percent were "bad" but turned "good."
• 7 percent were "good" but turned "bad."

It's dangerous to walk in New York

The New York Times says that a report from the New York City transporation planners reveals some counterintuitive findings about the dangers of walking in NYC:

• Despite their bad reputation, taxi cabs, "account­ed for far fewer pedestrian acci­dents in Manhattan than did pri­vate automobiles."
• "Jaywalkers were involved in fewer collisions than their law-abiding counter­parts who waited for the 'walk' sign."
• Male drivers cause 80 percent of accidents that result in a pe­destrian's death or serious in­jury.

Library shelves fall like dominoes

Someone played dominoes with the shelves in the Indiana State University library.

Ah, dominoes. It's always so much fun to watch them fall down, but so much work to set them up again.

World's best countries

Check out this great interactive graphic that shows the world's 100 best countries, based on education, health, quality of life, economic dynamism, and political environment. Americans (rank: 11) could greatly improve their lot in life by crossing the border to Canada (rank: 7) or moving to Austrailia (rank: 4). Of course, the overall best country is Finland (rank: 1), which has the best education system in the world.
Japan is the healthiest country, Norway offers the best quality of life, Singapore offers the most economic dynamism, and Sweden offers the best political environment. Whatever you do, don't move to the African nation of Burkina Faso, which has the worst quality of life and worst education system of the 100 countries listed.

Kids these days

Do you want to feel old? Yes, you say? Okay, read the Beloit College Mindset List for the Class of 2014. This list describes the world of today's college freshmen. For example,

• John McEnroe has never played professional tennis.
• DNA fingerprinting and maps of the human genome have always existed.
• Computers have never lacked a CD-ROM disk drive.
• Czechoslovakia has never existed.
• Second-hand smoke has always been an official carcinogen.
• Potato has always ended in an 'e' in New Jersey per vice presidential edict.
• They never twisted the coiled handset wire aimlessly around their wrists while chatting on the phone.

The Majestic Plastic Bag

Watch this touching documentary, which follows the path of the majestic plastic bag as it journeys to it's final destination, the Great Pacific Garbage Patch.

A New Take on Recycling

Inspired by the movie "Julie and Julia," this unemployed and very talented woman started a project: turn $1 garage sale dresses into fashion statements, one a day for a year. Her motto: "365 Days. 365 New Outfits. 365 Dollars." Check out her blog, where she turns some very ugly stuff into very fashionable duds. Here's just one of the amazing before-and-after shots.

When the 365 days are up, she is planning to auction off the outfits and donate the proceeds to charity.

Schnese

Schnese is a surname, and also the name of a dog breed.

• There is a person named Rese Schnese.
• The schnese dog breed is a cross between a Schnauzer and a Havanese.

Passer-by: "What a cute puppy! What breed is he?"
Dog Owner: "Schnese"
Passer-by: "Bless You"

Tylenol for "social pain"

A University of Florida study says that acetaminophen (Tylenol) is good for your pain, even your "social pain" from hurt feelings.  Apparently, social pain and physical pain use some of the same biochemical pathways. The study found that "people who took acetaminophen daily for three weeks reported less emotional suffering over time." Also, "because research has found that being rejected triggers aggression, using acetaminophen to alleviate emotional distress could reduce the likelihood of destructive actions." So maybe Tylenol is all that is needed to prevent workplace shootings. We should put it in the water.

Winners of the Ugly Sofa Contest

The winner of the Ugly Sofa Contest has been announced.

This sofa is ugly, but I've seen worse.

University Library appears in Inception

The snow fortress in the movie Inception (left) is modelled after the library at University of California, San Diego (right).




This unusual piece of architecture is the pride and joy of the university. The library's shape is featured in the university's logo.

This is not the first movie that has used the library. It has been featured in several films and TV shows and even a novel.

Important Dermatology Report: How to get an all-over tan

Dermatologist Jonathan L. Rees reports that the skin on your backside resists tanning because it is thick. If you really want a tan on your butt, Dr. Rees suggests that you use fake tanning lotion.

Medical research at its finest!

Crime is Expensive

Researchers have put a price tag on crime. The have added up the costs to society involved in catching, prosecuting and incarcerating criminals. They also added in the lost productivity of both criminal and victim. So how much does crime pay cost?

• Murder: $24 million
• Rape: $448,532
• Armed robbery:$335,733
• Simple burglary: $41,288

We've had a lot of posts about crime lately. It must be the bad economy.

Animated U.S. Unemployment Map: A Horror Film

Check out this animated map that depicts the U.S. unemployment rates by county from January 2007 through May 2010.

You can watch as the unemployment spreads from both coasts inward, eventually engulfing the Great Plains. (Apparently Nebraska is the safest place to be right now.) The map turns red, purple and then black as unemployment hits record levels. The colors are reminiscent of a black eye, which is what this economy has given us.




The map is courtesy of The American Observer, the graduate journalism magazine published through American University's School of Communication.

Respect for the Elderly Day

In preparation for "Respect the Elderly Day," Japanese officials were updating their list of centenarians. Police helped them break into the room of a man who was supposedly 111, only to find his mummified body. They believe that he actually died 30 years ago, but his relatives kept his death a secret so that they could collect his pension. Way to respect your elders!

In these tough economic times, even crime doesn't pay what it used to

A man who robbed a Wendy's restaurant called the restaurant twice to complain about the amount of money in the cash drawer that he stole. He reportedly said that "next time there better be more than $586."